Eighteenth Entry (November 10th, 2021)

     This day was just alright for me, as I had a lot of ups and downs throughout the day as I was experiencing periods of sadness due to the loss of my great aunt (which also reminded me of the loss of our family dog over the summer) and also a few periods of loneliness because I was particularly sad in the middle of the night as I was not out and about and able to socialize very much. I actually had engaged in deep breathing throughout the day because there were times where I was sad and close to breaking down despite working on coursework, which was also a newer experience for me throughout this project (and represents change in my ability to engage in self-care and manage my stress) because I often would wait to practice the deep breathing I do for 5 minutes, and I realized I could be doing deep breathing all day, which is far more helpful than doing it once per day. I also made sure to take it slow this day as well, which is also something newer for me because I usually overload my schedule each day and prioritize being busy. When I engaged in the deep breathing exercise in the night time, I had tried out a new breathing pattern that I had learn in a managing anxiety workshop I attended earlier in the day, in which you breathe in for 3 seconds, hold it for 3 seconds, and exhale for 3 seconds with each deep breath you take. This made the deep breathing much more easier to complete, because the method of breathing I used prior (where you count your deep breaths up to 10 and start over) was sometimes difficult because I lost the rhythm a few times. I also focused on my chest rising and falling to stay focused on how I was feeling in the moment, and felt my muscles relax and pain ease, which was nice as the pain was bothering me all of that day. After completing the exercise, I was less sad and more relaxed, and was finally able for a good night's sleep due to being more relaxed.